never in a month of Sundays
not a bit of it
not even one
piss all
in no way, shape, or form
zippo
ne'ery
diddly-squat
in any way, shape, or form
little
far from
never
nix
not by any means
not a chance
by any means
whatever
not in the slightest
nought
not in the least
no while
for love or money
in a pig's patoot
none
inexistent
in a hen's hiney
nowhile
any
over my dead body
in a pig's arse
anyhow
not on your life
no way
howsoever
anyway
no chance
nohow
no siree Bob
ne'er
zilch
nil
dick
square root of fuck all
goose egg
zip
duck egg
Chinaman's chance
nee way
zero
no way Jose